Feeling Anxious vs. Anxiety as a Mental Health Condition in Children

“An important difference to understand between feelings of anxiousness and having anxiety is that feeling anxious is a normal human emotion,” says Margaret. “As kids experience life, it’s normal and expected for them to feel anxious. But when more severe symptoms are present, like anxiety that impairs their functioning, impacts their sleep, appetite or desire to socialize, this tells us that something is wrong.”

Essentially, feelings of anxiousness affect our little ones for a brief time, and having anxiety as a mental health condition is more invasive, affecting their daily lives.

“The term anxiety is often said in place of worry, stress or anticipation. While all of these emotions are valid, they don’t rise to the level of clinical anxiety,” says Margaret.

“It’s important for us to differentiate anxiety, which can have a clinical undertone, and day-to-day worry or stress. It’s completely normal for children to feel worried or stressed before a dance recital or a big test at school and then experience relief once the moment has passed.

Anxiety on the other hand, is more of a mental state that affects the child’s functioning. If they’re so stressed that they can’t perform at a school event or go to school for a test, this is a clear indicator of anxiety.”

“Feeling nervous for things like an upcoming performance is normal for school-aged children to experience,” says Margaret. “It’s also common for kids going to a new school, joining an extracurricular activity or trying a new sport to experience nerves. These are common signs of everyday stress in children.”

She continues, “It becomes more worrisome if your child is experiencing symptoms like stomach pain, poor sleep or strong desires to skip school or events. Kids having stark behavior changes like avoiding, disengaging or withdrawing from their everyday routines tells us that their anxiety level is debilitating and affecting their functioning.”

Margaret advises, “Because children look to their parents during these moments, try to respond with support and understanding and offer gentle guidance as you navigate these emotions with them.”

“During early childhood, we typically offer play therapy, sand tray therapy or expressive therapy to help them talk through their feelings,” says Margaret. “For younger kids, it works best to help them process using these age-appropriate methods.”

“When children reach their adolescent and teen years, their brains are more developed and they’re able to understand and talk through more complex emotions, which allows us to explore other therapeutic methods — like cognitive behavioral therapy — which helps them understand how their thoughts influence their feelings, which then influences behavior.”

“If your child is experiencing changes in their mood, behavior, hygiene or self-care, that’s an indicator that something's wrong and it’s time to seek professional help,” says Margaret. “Other things to look for are your child no longer wanting to do things they once loved, seeming irritable or more jittery.”

To better support your little ones as they navigate their mental health, be sure to pay attention to all the details of their lives.

“Try to stay curious about your children’s mental health,” says Margaret. “Be sure to ask them questions and explore their thoughts and feelings so you can better support their mental wellness.” Good starter questions to ask your child include:

• I noticed you’ve been bringing up this topic a lot more recently. Do you want to talk about it more, so I can help you figure it out?
• I noticed that you’re feeling worried. Is there something you don’t want to do anymore, or don’t have fun doing, that you want to change?

Your little ones look to you for guidance and support when facing mental health challenges, so your support, curiosity and engagement mean the world to them.